Lines on the Death of Chairman Mao
By E. J. Thribb
So.
Farewell then
Chairman Mao.
You are the
Last of the
Great revolutionary
Figures. You
And I
Had little in
Common
Except that
Like me
You were a poet.
Though how you
Found time
To write poems
In addition to
Running a
Country of
800 million people
Is baffling
Frankly.
#2. My Last Duchess
By Robert Browning
That’s my last Duchess painted on the wall,
Looking as if she were alive. I call
That piece a wonder, now; Fra Pandolf’s hands
Worked busily a day, and there she stands.
Will’t please you sit and look at her? I said
“Fra Pandolf” by design, for never read
Strangers like you that pictured countenance,
The depth and passion of its earnest glance,
But to myself they turned (since none puts by
The curtain I have drawn for you, but I)
And seemed as they would ask me, if they durst,
How such a glance came there; so, not the first
Are you to turn and ask thus. Sir, ’twas not
Her husband’s presence only, called that spot
Of joy into the Duchess’ cheek; perhaps
Fra Pandolf chanced to say, “Her mantle laps
Over my lady’s wrist too much,” or “Paint
Must never hope to reproduce the faint
Half-flush that dies along her throat.” Such stuff
Was courtesy, she thought, and cause enough
For calling up that spot of joy. She had
A heart—how shall I say?— too soon made glad,
Too easily impressed; she liked whate’er
She looked on, and her looks went everywhere.
Sir, ’twas all one! My favour at her breast,
The dropping of the daylight in the West,
The bough of cherries some officious fool
Broke in the orchard for her, the white mule
She rode with round the terrace—all and each
Would draw from her alike the approving speech,
Or blush, at least. She thanked men—good! but thanked
Somehow—I know not how—as if she ranked
My gift of a nine-hundred-years-old name
With anybody’s gift. Who’d stoop to blame
This sort of trifling? Even had you skill
In speech—which I have not—to make your will
Quite clear to such an one, and say, “Just this
Or that in you disgusts me; here you miss,
Or there exceed the mark”—and if she let
Herself be lessoned so, nor plainly set
Her wits to yours, forsooth, and made excuse—
E’en then would be some stooping; and I choose
Never to stoop. Oh, sir, she smiled, no doubt,
Whene’er I passed her; but who passed without
Much the same smile? This grew; I gave commands;
Then all smiles stopped together. There she stands
As if alive. Will’t please you rise? We’ll meet
The company below, then. I repeat,
The Count your master’s known munificence
Is ample warrant that no just pretense
Of mine for dowry will be disallowed;
Though his fair daughter’s self, as I avowed
At starting, is my object. Nay, we’ll go
Together down, sir. Notice Neptune, though,
Taming a sea-horse, thought a rarity,
Which Claus of Innsbruck cast in bronze for me!
Nathaniel Winterson says
Let me do my best. The first one is not a poem. I hope I’m right, I get so many things wrong.
Buraq says
Oh dear. I have to choose between Thribb’s subtle satire that assassinates his subject and chintzy, twee Browning and his attempt at story-telling with a Stephen King undercurrent.
Not difficult, really. Thribb wins by a country mile. If Browning was/were around today, he’d be elbowing everybody out of the way at Ikea.
Billy Corr says
So farewell, Nicolae and Elena Ceaucescu,
received with honor by Nixon and Queen Elizabeth
and feted worldwide
And – in death – both of you upholding the finest of classical traditions . . .
“Impreuna am luptat – sa morim impreuna”
– We fought together, let us die together
A fine death like that of Marshal Antonescu’s,
if a little rather and nowhere near so photogenic
Mick says
Fine words Billy. A tribute to the reign of Nicolae Sturgescu, would also be welcome.
Billy Corr says
[1] Spelling error – MEA CULPA – the fourth line should read: “Impreuna am luptat – sa murim impreuna” – same root as Latin: “Memento Mori”
Mara Hari blew a kiss to her firing squad; Marshal Antonescu gave the order to fire himself: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9w8uUVSq1nM&rco=1
Mick says
There are few more poignant In Memoriams than EJ Thribb’s tribute to Martin McGuinness.
The bomber’s name was Martin,
He was famed for his musical farting.
When he knelt for his gong,
He let rip a song,
That blew out the lights in Long Lartin.
Michael says
The E J Thribb ‘poems’ are from the satirical magazine Private Eye. They are supposedly written by a teenager (non-existent). They are a joke – already a parody of modern verse themselves.
Peter says
Just a minor point – you are aware, of course, that Private Eye’s E J Thribb was a satire on garbage “modern poetry”?