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Now That Baseball Is Fully Woke, It Needs New Rules

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My latest in PJ Media:

In a hot rage over Georgia’s much-misrepresented election integrity law, Major League Baseball is moving this year’s All-Star Game out of Atlanta, but that isn’t enough. In fact, it should be just the beginning. Now that MLB has made it clear that only those of a certain political perspective should be allowed to enjoy a baseball game, the rules of the venerable old National Pastime must be adjusted in light of new sensibilities. Commissioner Rob Manfred has already started this ball rolling with a raft of “baseball is boring, let’s hurry it up” rules, such as seven-inning doubleheaders and runners starting on second base in extra innings. Now he needs to finish the job, and administer the coup de grace to the Grand Old Game. Rob’s woke masters expect nothing less.

A few years ago, baseball streamlined the intentional walk by making it a matter of designation, without the pitcher having to go to the trouble of throwing four outside pitches, thus forever robbing the game of spectacles such as Rollie Fingers’ spectacular strikeout of Johnny Bench on a fake intentional walk ball four pitch in the 1972 World Series. Now that we have saved all that time, we can use some of it to determine whether the pitcher in a given game situation is a publicly known Trump supporter; in such a case, the batter (if he is woke, of course!) is immediately awarded a home run. If the umpire has reason to suspect that the pitcher, although he hasn’t said anything political in his life, is a closet Trump supporter, the batter will immediately be awarded first base.

It works both ways, of course. If the batter has a lower Social Credit score than the pitcher, that is, the batter is less woke, then he automatically strikes out, or, if the difference between them is not that great, then he is given one or two automatic strikes, as is deemed proper by the umpires.

In order to assure the fairness of this process, the umpires will all have to be people of color (especially recent immigrants), LGBT, or trans, or some combination of these. In case of any dispute within the umpiring staff, the views of those umpires who are trans lesbian black or brown people will take precedence.

That’s another thing. In the interests of racial equity, and to correct the monstrous injustices done to the black players of the Negro Leagues, every player of color (except, of course, known Trump supporters), as well as every gay, lesbian, and trans player who comes up to bat will be allowed four strikes before being called out; every oppressive white male player will have to skulk back to the bench after only two strikes.

There is more. Read the rest here.

Comments

  1. In the feature article, Robert Spencer states:

    “…Rollie Fingers’ spectacular strikeout of Johnny Bench on a fake intentional walk ball four pitch in the 1972 World Series”

    Robert, I’m impressed! I had absolutely no idea that you were a baseball fan – at least up until the time of the new “woke” MLB!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nR0jGrfQCu4

    • Robert Spencer, along with the rest of his vast accomplishments, is also very knowledgeable about baseball.

      • Gravenimage: This article might as well have been in some strange foreign language.
        I could not understand a word of it except maybe, hitter, pitcher and home run, but then I do not like any sport finding them all childish. The only sport I might watch would be
        Women’s Beach Volleyball but not of course for ‘sporting’ reasons

    • Coming from cricket, I wanted to figure out what I could about baseball, and then its history and current standings, but all this woketivism has totally turned me off. Wonder if there’s any American sport unaffected? Golf maybe, if one can call it a sport?

      • Never feat Infidel, Wokism will be coming to a Cricket Club near you in the not too distant.

        • I live in the US, but looking at the world…

          When cricket resumed late last year after the BLM riots here, the reactions were different. In their first games that they played, both England’s and West Indies teams knelt in solidarity w/ BLM, and there were major panels on racism w/ Michael Holding, one of the world’s legendary pace bowlers. Otoh, when India and Australia started playing, they avoided the kneeling, and in the IPL last year, only 1 Indian cricketer knelt. Some of the Indian cricketers are pretty woke, like their captain Virat Kohli, who every Diwali calls for the festival to be celebrated w/o fireworks. However, one thing that they’ve been careful about: not to oppose India’s ban on ties w/ Pakistan, which has always been a touchy subject

          So I trust India and Australia not to get woke. England, South Africa, New Zealand and West Indies, not so much. Pakistan and Bangladesh in the meantime are getting more islamic, while Afghanistan by contrast looks more sane than Pakistan and Bangladesh

        • Okay, I did note that Australia wasn’t participating in the BLM kneeling, but I hadn’t noticed this story about the wokeness of Cricket Australia in the Big Bash. Anyway, their current side is a shadow of the side that they had in the last 30 years – from 1990 to 2020, so no big loss, really!

      • First, congrats to Robert for a brilliantly mocking piece that highlights rapidly spreading American insanity. To any awake foreigner, America is now just a pathetic lunatic asylum run by Biden’s leftist/socialist/communist inmates. It is astounding and pathetic watching citizens of the once mighty United States of America destroy their own country. Maybe democracy permits too much freedom and lack if discipline, so lies and pure rubbish is permitted in the name of free speech – until the lies and free speech destroy the society. China must be thrilled, salivating as it awaits its take-over of Joe Biden’s dimwitted America that cannot but at some stage simply collapse under a load of debt and failing economy. But let me not appear as if gloating because I’m living in another lunatic asylum, Justin Trudeau’s clueless Canada where political correctness rules, where facts and truth count for little, and like America, the media is mostly rubbish.

        The word ‘woke’ originates with black Americans, about 70 percent of whom fall out of school. So, no surprise, the idiotic word ‘woke’ stems from mostly poorly educated people who are too clueless to produce the word ‘awaken’ or ‘wake’, and too ignorant to know much about real history so make it up as time passes.

    • Yeahbut. Whatabout commie spies & how badly they have been discriminated against & oppressed? Not to mention even executed? And so on forever.

  2. Now That Baseball Is Fully Woke, It Needs New Rules
    …………….

    I realize that some of this is tongue-in-cheek, but just barely.

    Baseball is my favorite sport, and I used to love hearing “Pitchers and Catchers report” in February and know that Baseball season was just around the corner. Now it is becoming as joyless as sports like Basketball and Football, already largely ruined by “political correctness”. So depressing.

    • it might not be such a bad thing, GI; in the USSR, the state went to *great* lengths to interest people in sports under the assumption that if they watched sports, they wouldn’t have time to watch the nomenklatura get special privileges and better pay than non-Party members. if there are no longer any sports, the state will have a much harder time distracting people, since everybody already knows that all “entertainment” is as nazified as politics.

      • b.a. freeman–with all respect–I’ve been able to take in a few baseball games in the past without ignoring the political and moral state of the world.

        So has Robert Spencer.

        And until quite recently baseball was mostly pretty apolitical–enjoyed by Americans of all kinds.

  3. “every player of color (except, of course, known Trump supporters), as well as every gay, lesbian, and trans player who comes up to bat”

    All of these players get an automatic home run. They don’t need to prove that they hit the ball and it went over the fence. Everyone can just take their word for it. To level the playing field and make it fair
    all President Trump supporters have to run backwards blindfolded. Instead of coaches arguing with umpires dugout burning will be the official way to protest a bad call.

  4. Robert Spencer is correct. The ‘woke’ culture wants equality of outcome, regardless of talent and regardless of effort. The result is that ‘official victim groups’ will get a PERMANENT CODIFIED HANDICAP, such as the handicap for women playing golf with men.

    The average male golfer has a handicap of 16.1, while the average female has a handicap of 28.9

      • Sure, just declare yourself a woman for the duration of the game, and switch back after you pull out of the parking lot. Next time you come to play, switch back again to womanism, play and after leaving, switch back again and lead your normal life. Changing b/w male and female is about as seamless as changing shirts

  5. I’m wondering how the Tokyo 2021 Summer Olympics and the Beijing 2022 Winter Olympics will get on with the Western transgender athlete situation. It will be very interesting. Does anyone have any info on this? These countries do have transgenders, but I doubt they have any who are of Olympic standard. Could be a little awkward. They have no idea what is coming their way.

    • Good question–and not just that issue, but “wokeness” in general.

  6. Well major league professional sports is a form of entertainment. If the FAR LRFT “WOKE” or who ever wants to continue to make sports Political and Racist then I and millions of other fans will walk away from watching and supporting the games.

    If I’am not mistaken the professional sports and corporate “COKE’ etc. need to remember that 65% of their market is made up of WHITE people of the American population. BLM represents about 7% plus.

    All Lives Matter, The value of life should not be based on race or color of skin, but on the actions and quality that a person brings to their community.

  7. Hitler called this IDEOLOGICAL SYCHRONIZATION of all activities and industries “GLEICHSCALTUNG”.

    Baseball has just been put into a ‘WOKIST’ GLEICHSCHALTUNG … all political ideas expressed by baseball players henceforth must be ‘NAZI’ … oops, I mean … they must be ‘WOKE’.

    ‘Woke’ baseball players will from now on be the only ones who may win, so no baseball player will in future be a member of the ‘wrong’ political party … if he knows what’s good for him.

    BASEBALL GLEICHSCHALTUNG!

  8. Here is the definition of the word Woke from the Merriam Webster dictionary:
    chiefly US slang
    : aware of and actively attentive to important facts and issues (especially issues of racial and social justice)

    So if Woke means being aware and active in opposing racism and social injustice, how come tens of millions of Americans see this attitude as evil. There are only two answers. One are people who feel that American can only thrive in a survival of the fittest society in which the state has no role to play, or racists who don’t want anyone telling them not to say nigger. Bottom line, both groups are sociopathic people without empathy.

    • Lorensacho, I’m sorry but this is absurd. Yes, supposedly being “Woke” means being sensitive to racism and ‘social justice’–but in reality this is most often extreme “political correctness” and even reverse racism, and is often the very opposite of actual justice.

      Part of Leftist rhetoric is the manipulation of language–I would not take this at face value as you appear to be doing.

      For instance, shaming white people and making them apologize for their ethnicity is often considered “anti-racist” by the hard Left, even though it is itself clearly racism.

  9. Let’s see now, in addition to “Coke Classic”, you can now get – you guessed it:

    “Woke Coke”…

    • James

      I normally would have boycotted it, but I’m too addicted to Coke, so won’t even pretend! I will happily boycott Delta and AA, though! Intel and Cisco, tough – it’s like trying to buy electrical appliances not made in China

      But those whose customers do have options, it’ll be interesting to be a fly on the wall at their next shareholders’ meet

  10. Woke Coke I like that, it may not be for me, but it has a certain marketing jingle.

  11. I plan to do all I can to avoid seeing/hearing even 1 minute of any baseball game this summer.

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